The easy-to-manipulate nature of the Online Dating world has always been a source of problems for individuals looking to locate a potential date or mate. The primary issue is that information is, generally speaking, not confirmed or even inspected to validate their accuracy. This naturally leads to problems as searches look through photographs and read fictious profiles and are left wondering how much is true.

In attempts to add a new level of security and protection to the industry, a number of new protections are in the works. My experience in this field tells me there are in fact 4 different form factors:

Offline Integrated Services

These services provide the ultimate security for users as they require real-life, in-person confirmation of facts and background before access is provided

Online Integrated Services

These services provide background checks and other forms of validation as part of the registration process

Add-on Services

These services provide verification of profile data after the fact, awarding varying levels of certification for specific data points or the entire profile

Policing Services

These services allow members to report other members that post wrong or inappropriate information about themselves

Here’s a quote from the article:

Amid a big increase in online dating, trust remains a key concern. Background checks “remove that barrier,” says Abha Bhagat, a senior analyst with Nielsen/NetRatings. Around the industry, she says “there’s been quite a bit of buzz and interest.”

Since the dawn of personal ads, people have been crafting their profiles to make themselves sound more appealing, from exaggerating their looks and career success to lying about key details like marital status. Pictures have helped eliminate some of the more superficial lies, but other details can still easily be fudged. Such tall tales have left many wary of logging on for love — a whopping 80% of online single adults don’t online date, according to Jupiter Research.

Internet personals are betting that background checks will help build trust into the online dating experience and generate additional revenue from the added services. This trust has become more critical thanks to increasing competition from social-networking sites like closely held Friendster, which offer a seemingly more secure environment of extended acquaintances.

Source: Wall Street Journal

I think one of the most interesting and useful thoughts in the article was here:

Beth Givens, director of the Privacy Rights Clearinghouse, a San Diego nonprofit that educates consumers about privacy protection, warns that some people may be getting a false sense of security. Ms. Givens points out, for example, that restraining orders may not come up in criminal checks. “Just because someone has no criminal history doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be a dangerous person to get to know,” she says.

Source: Wall Street Journal

Clearly, we got into this problem because most people tend to believe anything as long as you can find it on the web. It’s hard to tell why this line will be any less difficult to cross.

I picked up a copy of the Time Out New York Offline Dating issue, naturally intrigued by the potential subject matter. I was quite happy to find a great piece written by Virginia Vitzthum titled “Dating Without a Net” that talks about some of the backlash that is newly spawned by the surge in online dating. Here are a couple of choice quotations from that article:

The majority of those interviewed have e-courted at some point, after tiring, perhaps, pretending they don’t want a mate. They are typically disheartened by the gap between the written self and the corporeal self. Gavin, a 35-year-old freelance writer, is taking a break from Internet dating because he’s tired of “falling into intense online relationships based on the e-facade that people — myself as well — put up for public consumption.

Time Out New York

Perhaps my favorite quote came from from a gentleman named Alexander:

“No matter how arranged or engineered the offline situation is — bar, poetry reading, blind date, speed dating, Pilates class, etc. — the relationship begins with that first visual, visceral impression that is more important than any amount of careful e-mail, wordplay, sexy phone talk or traded photos. Meeting someone face to face is just more intense and natural, like dogs in the park sniffing each other’s asses.

Time Out New York

A couple of days ago, in “Faulting Fuzziness”, I mentioned that one of the problems with the current crop of SNS systems was that they failed to account for the value and role and interaction in their systems. I think the sentiments expressed above affirm this. Truly the spark and chemistry that people feel is something that hard, if not impossible, to re-create and definitely not to be taken lightly.

In a related note, I wonder if we can expect many more commentaries of this kind now that people are starting to express their issues. I’ve found that often people will waiver on things but not take action one way or the other, however, once the public opinion changes in one way or the other people are likely to react.

For anyone that’s remotely interested in the topics I cover here, I highly recommend the Social Software Weblog. There is always new content and links to some interesting places on the web. Today, I came across this tidbit:

The number of people visiting dating websites has increased by 45 per cent since January 2003, with the online dating sector now representing 0.8 per cent of all online visits.

Popular sites include Match.com, FriendsReunited Dating, Friendster.com and Gaydar – the UK’s top gay dating website. Almost a third of visitors are aged between 25 and 34, while 34 per cent live in London and the South East.

Statistics also show that visitors are spending 13 minutes and 18 seconds on a dating site, which is nearly twice the amount of time that internet users spend on sites in general (six minutes and 47 seconds).

Since January 2003, almost 200 new dating sites have emerged on the internet, although 60 per cent of traffic still goes to the top 10 dating sites.

Source: Webuser Internet Magazine via Social Software Weblog

It’s no surprise these apps are holding customers longer, they have some fairly compelling content ;) Or maybe it’s just that the systems are designed to make it harder for you to really find someone?

Was reading “OK/Cancel“, a usability blog, a few minutes ago and came across a good comment from another individual. Since I was intrigued by his comment, I followed his link to his site to find more interesting content. Atop that blog was a quick list of links to friends, which is exactly where I came across the link to “Becoming Dated“.

Lance Arthur, a San Francico resident, and self-proclaimed “hater” of the Online Dating scene provides a lengthy account of his transition from to a “believer” in the Digital Date and the truths that made it all possible. As Lance puts it:

Lately, the nightmare of Online Dating has turned into rather the opposite. Suddenly, guys—and these are nice, normal, well-adjusted, attractive, healthy guys—are coming out of the woodwork and dating me. I changed a few things around about my attitude and my ad, and so far it’s all working out swimmingly.

Since I previously derided the entire Online Dating scene as being for losers and ne’er-do-wells, I thought it only prudent to amend some of my comments and pass on what I have learned about successfully diving into the world of online relationships.

Source: LanceArthur.com

I thought it was great to read someone’s experiences in this area and to see how insightful that knowledge gained from the trenches really can be. Read it all!

I’m never mazed at how seemingly random connections are made on the web.

Gothamist gets a good scoop on something of particular interest to me. It seems that a new singles site, NYUSingles.com has launched that is designed to get NYU alumnus, students, and anyone else with an NYU fettish to sign up and hook up.

One kind poster, identified as Anthony (a fellow NYU Alum and study of sociology) did some research and found out that the backers of NYUSingles is actually a company called White Buffalo Ventures, Inc.. Seems they do this sort of thing for a living.

Being an entrepreneur myself with an interest in these forms of networks, many questions come to mind. How strong are our ties to organizations, from educational to social? What is the value of these special-purpose singles communities? Are they successful?

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